Who exactly is the crazy one?

I am average. I am average intelligence, average talent, average looks, average weight. Average everything. Yet the people around me disagree. Take my boyfriend for example. He thinks I am beautiful and talented. A guy friend of mine doesn't understand me wanting to lose weight because I'm "already so skinny!" (And he has nudes of me, so he's seen it all). People I have never met message me on facebook begging me to add them because I'm so pretty. The people around me see me as this crazy amazing creature. But they are so wrong!
I'm not exceptional in any way. Yeah, maybe I'm not as bad at everything as I used to believe. But I am not good. I am average. Just average. They think I am crazy for believing this. But why don't they realize that I am the only one who is seeing clearly? I am not the crazy one, they are.
Is it because my expectations are too high? Or are their expectations too low?
It's ridiculous. Just because I am okay, they think I am great. But I'm not. I'm just okay. And I want to be so much more. I'm tired of being average. I want to be perfect.
I know it's unrealistic. Perfection does not exist. But I don't care. It's what I want, and nothing less than perfect is going to be good enough for me. I don't want to be pretty, I want to be flawless. I don't want to be skinny, I want to be weightless. I don't want to be talented-I want to be perfect. Nothing less is enough. Nothing less is acceptable.
Maybe I try too hard. But at the same time, I don't try hard enough. I know what I want and how to get there, but I don't have the energy to commit myself to doing it. I'm lazy. I could be skinnier. I could be prettier. I just don't try hard enough. To be honest, I'm not sure how to try any harder. But I'm learning. I'm searching for ways to try.
I know what I am. I'm your average small town girl with a big nose, a big voice, and a half-decent body. But I want more. And I know what I want to be. Perfect. Porcelain. Mysterious. Sexy, but in a flawless, untouchable way. I want to make people stop and stare.
And you know what? I will one day. I don't care how long it takes. Nothing is going to stop me.